


Guardian of the Gate

by forestofmyown



Category: Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion
Genre: Ableism, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, M/M, Other, Reader-Insert, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-12
Updated: 2017-01-12
Packaged: 2018-09-16 22:46:34
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,939
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9292847
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/forestofmyown/pseuds/forestofmyown
Summary: Post-Shivering Isles, it's time for you to take up your mantle and close the gate to Tamriel.  This also means saying goodbye to a certain gatekeeper you've come to know quite well.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Once again, an older fic rewrote to be an imagine. Underappreciated character appreciation fic! Originally posted at: http://imaginingmyforest.tumblr.com/

You step out of the portal joining what was now your world to the one you've known your whole life; the place you were born, raised, and have called home all your years. The water stretches out, a glistening blanket that never ceases to fill you with wonder. You're Tamriel born, or at least you were, and you'll miss your homeland. But what you'll miss most ...

Gaius is seated at the bottom of the steps, the blade that is his eternal companion strapped to his hip, helmet for once discarded at his feet. You can tell from the slump in his shoulders, the weary curve of his back, and lull in his neck that he's tired. Half exhausted, worn down, and, of course, bored. You smile and slip onto the stone beside him. He doesn't move.

"Some guard you are," you comment idly, staring off again out over the water.

"What's there to guard?" he asks, his voice an echo of his weariness. "Nothing ever comes through anymore but you."

"And here I thought you'd be grateful. I'm doing a you a favor. I don't have to guard my side of the gate, after all. I could send more of my citizens through at any moment."

You eyes S'fara, curled up beneath a scraggly bush a few feet away, purring softly in sweet sleep.

"At least I'd have something to do." He sighs heavily. "This door is too dangerous to leave unguarded, but having the job of guarding it is just … "

"You miss home." It's there, out in the distance, across the water; Bravil, it's high walls and peeking rooftops. You's been afraid to ask until now, but you swallow hard and asks anyway. "Do you have a family back there?"

He's never mentioned anyone before, not loved ones, not friends. He's serious, brooding, no nonsense and all chivalry. Even if it wasn't his responsibility, he'd be out here, guarding this gate, you know. That's probably why he was given the assignment in the first place.

"Family? Yeah." He shakes his head, giving his short hair a rub, and he doesn't know how your heart halts as his admission hangs in the air. "Overbearing father too stubborn to die, useless brother who thinks he knows everything. Couple of drinking buddies I'd call friends who're more like family than either of those two, and I don't even like those drunks."

You laugh, relief restarting the beating in your chest. "Then what are you complaining about being out here for? Doesn't sound like you'd be any happier back home."

"Probably not. I miss the barracks, though. Guard duty, making rounds. I just sit here all day." He snatches up his helmet, stares himself down in the grimy reflection, then stuffs it rather roughly back onto his head. "Anything interesting happening on your side?"

War. Death. Rebirth.

"Yeah, funny stuff."

"What more would you expect from the land of madness?"

You laugh, and a ghost of a smile flickers across his face. "Can you believe they're sticking me in charge of the place?"

The smile's gone now, if it was ever there. "What?"

"Madgod took a vacation," you shrug, burying the lie deep inside; you can't face it, not yet. "Now I gotta fix the mess he left behind. Starting with this door."

You tap the empty space between them, skin resting on cool stone.

" … You're closing the gate?"

"Yes."

"And you're staying on that side?"

You don't want to. You almost scream it.

"Yes." His face is openly stunned, and you smile that smile that hurts inside. "No more guard duty."

He's silent, his face unreadable. He looks away. "Good."

A crack runs through your heart. A piece tumbles away, falls into a pit of darkness you can't see into.

You nod towards the city, smile shifting your face away from the pain. "Go enjoy your life again. Job done."

"And they're just sticking you in charge over there, just like that?"

"What did you expect?" You roll your eyes playfully, willing the burning of emotion to hold back. "Land of madness, remember? Boss-man opens a door and picks a random person to hold down the fort while he's gone, no one questions it."

"When's he coming back?"

You shakes your head, leaning back, letting the light from the gate settle over you. "Not for a long, long time."

He turns, shifting in his spot to watch you, face wary, concerned. "Wait a minute. So you don't get to come back? Ever? This isn't just a 'wait for him to get back and send you home' thing, he's leaving you in charge indefinitely?"

You keep your eyes closed, unable to look at him. "Till I'm dead."

Dead. Gone. Same difference. In the end, he'll be back, and you won't exist; you understand that now.

"He can't do that!"

You smirk. "Daedra."

"Well, he's already gone, right? Not much he can do about it if you just don't go back! Stay here, Y/N."

You want to. So much. So bad. You can't. Can't.

"Can't."

It's crushing you.

"Why in Oblivion not!?"

"I made a friend a promise, and it's too late to back out." You smile at him again, so painfully. "I wanted to help. And now I have to follow through with that."

You realize you’re shaking about the time the tears run off the edge of your cheeks and start tiny puddles on your bare shoulders. He's staring at you, so shocked and confused you laugh a little bit, and it turns into a sob you try to hide behind a hand.

"I made a deal with a Deadra, Gaius." You shake your head, wiping away the tears. "I didn't know what I was getting into, but I would have done it even if I had. I saved people. I saved lives. But I had to give my own life to do it."

You falter.

"I don't belong to me any more. I'm his. And I'm dying."

It's the best you can do. And you can tell by the horror, the indignation, the despair on his face, that it isn't enough. You get up and step towards the gate.

"Now just wait a second!"

He's scrambling to get up, and you turn to watch him, smile back in place.

You chuckle. "Gods, I'm gonna miss this. You and me. Guard duty."

He's standing there, anger on his face, blocking out everything else, silhouetted against the sickly foliage and the horizon of dark water stretching out in the distance. You wonder if you should tell him before you go. But that would be bad, wouldn't it? You really want to stop hurting him like this. You just came to say goodbye.

Gaius is shouting at you, and you only finds it endearing. "What in Oblivion do you mean, you're dying? Y/N, what in Oblivion is going on?"

"I'm going." You say simply. "And I'm not-"

He's breaking you. The anger he's using to try and mask the pain is failing, and your heart breaks for him. You can feel it. Your voice catches, your eyes start to burn, and you have to take a deep breath to get it all out.

And I'm not ever going to see you again.

"And I'm not ever coming back."

You give a tiny wave and back up into the gate.

"Bye."

You slip away. He slips out of sight. And you're back in the Shivering Isles. A few more steps back and you're leaning against Haskill's table for support, tears finally streaming down. It isn't just crying, it's sobbing, and you can't breathe, everything hurts so much.

Because that's it. And it's time to close the gate for good.

You raise your hand-

And Gaius tumbles through the light.

You both stand, staring in stunned silence, mere feet from each other under the twisting pink sky of a stormy plane of Oblivion. His sword and shield are ready, as though he expected confrontation at his entrance, but his eyes are locked on yours, and he slowly lowers his weapon.

He struggles for several moments with what to say before settling with, "Don't pretend to smile at me when you're hurting."

"I had to," you mumble, hand still hovering in the air between them. "I have to let you go."

"Well," he grumbles right back. "I'm here anyway."

"I'm closing the door."

"I know that."

"I won't open it again."

"I know!" He snaps, taking a step towards you, then stopping uneasily.

"You should go back."

"I'm not going anywhere! And you are going to explain everything, do you understand me?"

You stare at him, unsure. When you answer, it's low but clear. "Sheogorath was cursed, and he used me to break his curse. He is no longer the Madgod. But there must be a Madgod. So I'm his successor. I'm turning into a Daedra. More specifically, I'm turning into Sheogorath. And I don't know how long it will take, how long I have left as 'Y/N.'"

"The blazes?" He responds, his confusion obvious. "That's … "

But he trails off, watching your serious expression and knowing he can't argue with it, can't deny it.

"Go back, Gaius."

"Stop telling me to go back!"

"You can't stay here. I won't be around long, anyway."

"I'll stay for as long as you have! I'm not leaving you!"

You're crying again, and he catches himself, catches what he's saying. He made up his mind without ever making up his mind. He's that type.

"Close the gate. I'm not going back. Nothing there for me, anyway."

"And what's here for you?"

He almost growls, and you laugh, shocked and amused by it. He looks like he's going to answer, thinks better of it, throws off his reservations, and pulls you to him. His lips are rough, dry, and chapped, and the bristles of his stubble scratch your skin. But his kiss is long and firm and desperate, conveying with actions what he can't with words. You wrap your arms around him, just as desperate, clinging to him, to yourself, to life, even if it's only for a little while longer. You'll take whatever you can get if he'll be there with you.

When you part, he doesn't bother to pull his head up, but holds you there against him. "Close the gate."

Slowly, you raise and lower your hand. The light of the gate brightens, flickers, and fades. He turns slightly to watch it go, then shrugs and shifts uncomfortably in place. He keeps one arm firmly around you.

"Now what?"

You're surprised at just how embarrassed you are at what has just happened, at the continued presence of him beside you, your contact. Nervously, you reply, "I suppose I name you Consort of the realm and get you acquainted with the palace."

"I … what?"

You wring your hands nervously. "I am the Madgod. I should also go ahead and make arrangements for if we ever decide to go our separate ways. Or if I change into Sheogorath and don't remember you or something along those lines. I'll show you around the two regions–Mania and Dementia–and you can pick a place. Or stay at the Palace. Or I'll have a house made, if you like."

He stares at you before nodding in a resigned way. "Consort to a Daedra. Right."

"Have I scared you off?"

"Can't scare me off. I already had you close the gate." He flexes his hand around your waist as though to reassure himself of his decision. Unease suddenly makes him frown. "Mara's love, I hope someone takes care of S'fara."


End file.
